URGENT: HOME DEVICE RECALL
<MOTHERS: ALL MODELS>
Please return all mothers who cannot:
- Replicate Etsy craft ideas;
- Create shop-quality birthday cakes;
- Organise playdates, parties and picnics at short notice;
- Survive on only children’s leftovers;
- Function optimally on less than four hours sleep.
Please return all mothers who:
- Shout about lost P.E. kits;
- Hide in the kitchen, stuffing chocolate and swigging wine;
- Complain about the lack of “me time”;
- Lock themselves in the bathroom to gush snot and tears onto torn toilet paper;
- Regret.
(Contact Customer Services for your FREE replacement)
Laura Besley is the author of micro fiction collection, 100neHundred, and flash fiction collection, The Almost Mothers. Having lived in the Netherlands, Germany and Hong Kong, she now lives in land-locked central England and misses the sea. She tweets @laurabesley