Consider your responses carefully. You have 60 seconds to answer all questions. Any unanswered questions will be used as evidence of a criminally deficient personality, as will refusal to participate.
Can you eat the feet of a bear?
Would you rather have a gullet or a mullet?
What is hiding in the clock?
Does your uncle keep a prisoner in the cellar Y/N?
What did your mother say when she dropped you?
“Whoops!!!” or “Upsy-daisy!!!”?
Is it shining or is it on fire?
In what mood do you approach your plate?
What would you ask the ghost of a) your father b) Shakespeare c) your father disguised as Shakespeare d) Shakespeare disguised as your father?
If Tom has 60 jars of jam and Jenny has 17, how long would it take them to eat all the jam and what does that tell you about the value of X?
Who needs that much jam anyway?
What will happen to you now?
Rachel is a writer based in the Peak District. Her poetry and prose have been published online and in print, most recently in Beir Bua Journal, Tether's End Magazine, and Paragraph Planet.