hey, you - a voicemail i don't send by Ashley Elizabeth

i wrote you the book i always told you i would write
about you
i know it is different than you expect
i know we are different than we expected
you, a girl dad and a father
to a boy named Ashton (i mean could ya get any closer to my name) and i
break in the way i see these pictures
but i can’t stop myself from watching like
the way i can’t stop myself from wanting
the way you held me that day
can’t help the way i check your instagram for updates
because your kids are both so damn cute (& i still care)
in a dream i hug you then walk past
not looking back; try to forget this upon waking
in a dream, i love you
in a dream, we fly the freak flag
like we did in real life
on a daybed or whiskey leather couch in the past
in a dream, you are not tied down
& neither am i.
in a dream, we talk about stars
and which one we hope to return as
always ones that seem nearby
but end up light years away.
Someone has been private calling me
& each time, i hope it is you.
Ashley Elizabeth is a writing consultant, teacher, and poet. Her works have appeared in SWWIM, The Hellebore, and Lucky Jefferson, among others. Her chapbook, you were supposed to be a friend, is available from Nightingale & Sparrow. Ashley lives in Baltimore, MD with her partner and their cat. Twitter: @ae_thepoet