A Trip to One’s Childhood Home Does Not a Habit Break by Stephen Ground

mommy & daddy are upstairs asleep & I’m
down where I shouldn’t be, considering the
implications of introducing relief to the six-
foot deep ditch in my chest. maybe creeping
outside to puff & cough under bald light in
muffled silence, letting neighbours I’ve never
seen peacefully achieve what I’m no longer
capable of finding myself – serenity earned
from lights out before the light of dawn, eyes
closed before finding closure on another day
of twisted tubes, bursting organs, bulging discs
& thighs rigid as pressure-treated fenceposts.
struggling to stand, I slide on shoes to trod
outside with spiders & nightmare centipedes
to pump the ditch with anxious, soothing flame.
total deconstruction [some assembly required].
Stephen Ground is a prose writer, poet, filmmaker, and picture-taker based in Treaty 1 Territory (Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada). Twitter/Instagram: @sualtmo www.stephenground.com